There is no process that myself and Jen have been through together, that has been as drawn out as much as compiling a list of potential names for our baby.
Car journey’s, pre-cinema drinks, weekend coffee & cake rituals, sitting on the toilet, these have all now been dedicated to time spent scrolling the internet for lists of potential names. If we’ve got time to drive, drink, eat and shit, then we’ve got time to look at some more names!
Most popular. Most uncommon. Traditional. On trend. Names of the 1800’s. Forgotten names. Names making a comeback. What ever happened to babies called Ian? Royal Babies. You name it, we’ve looked it up. Ok, maybe not that Ian one. That name can stay with the footballing legends like Ian Rush, Ian Wright and Ian Woan. Yes that’s right, Ian Woan. Footballing legend! (You reds!)
Then comes those awkward discussions that always come up when people start asking you if you’ve picked a name yet. You know what I mean, they go exactly like this;
Them: So have you guys started thinking about names yet?
Us: Yeah, we’ve started compiling a list of potential boys and girls names.
Them: Oh that’s nice.
Us: Yeah. Nothing decided yet though.
Them: We know a friend who’s just had a baby, and you won’t believe what they’ve called it. They’ve just had a baby girl and called it [insert any name that for all they know is on your list of potential baby names].
Fortunately, every time we’ve had someone say that to us, which believe me, has happened a few times now, the name that followed has not been on our list.
People are funny about names though. At no point during my adult life, have I been introduced to someone and thought “yikes, why did their parents call them that? I wouldn’t have chosen that name”. Yet we do it all the time when we hear what people have called their babies. Well not to their face. But we are all guilty at some point in our lives of saying something like “aww, that’s a lovely name. It really suits him” but secretly thinking “…f***ing Trevor? Who calls their baby Trevor?!” Everyone’s opinion can be so different. And rightly so! Otherwise we’d all be called Ian!
There’s no way would we share the names on our list with anyone prior to the actual naming of the baby. Because there is an absolute guarantee that someone won’t like it. And, like so many things in life, one negative comment, thought or just feeling, can carry so much more weight than ten positive ones. I’d hate to think that what I wanted to call our child could be influenced by anyone else. Other than Jen that is. I guess she gets a say.
Anyway. So how about picking that name? The way we are tackling it, is that one of us will read through a long list of names, and read out any that spark any interest. If the other agree’s then it’s added to the list. If not, we move on.
We have each had to veto a lot of names due to people we have known in our lives;
“there was a bully at my school called that”
“I once slept with someone called that”
“there was a girl I used to work with who once dated a guy whose brother’s girlfriend’s mother’s dog was called that.”
For a long time, the list wasn’t very long. So instead of just reading baby names lists online, we started listening out for character names on TV, even watching credits rolling out at the end of a movie. There’s tonnes of names there.
But now I think we’re getting down to the nitty gritty. We’re eliminating more names than we’re adding, and we’re starting to add middle names.
One thing we’re trying is referring to the baby as one particular name for a whole day and seeing how it feels. I guess it’s a bit like taking a car out for a test drive.
But as we get closer to the big day, we now start to realise the pressure of others we know who are having babies. And not just those we know. It was a big relief when we heard that the new Prince was called Louis as he was not on our list. One of Jen’s best friends recently had a baby, and again the little chappy was called a name not on our list.
Next up will be my sister, due before us. She’s picked a name for her soon to be born baby girl already, but is rightly keeping it a secret. We’ve just got to hope that whatever she is called, is not on our list. But then it also works both ways. One of my closest friends is having a baby not too long after us, and I’m sure they’re thinking the same about us.
One threat to our baby names list that we weren’t ready for though was my mum, who just got a new puppy. Without even the slightest consideration of running her name choice for her latest four legged friend with either us or my sister, she just announced her new puppies name. Thankfully it wasn’t on our list though. Although it is a name that I saw on many a list online.
No. It wasn’t Ian.
T-minus 75 days!